Yesterday was Therapy Tuesday. I received an email from Ms. VY Teacher detailing a complex lie Hope was caught in and the lies she told to get out of the first lie. Hope was not happy... she had told me she had a good day.
We fed them and went to therapy. The Dad dropped the girls and I off and went to get more coffee. As soon as we walked in the therapist's waiting room, Hope realized she for got her pencil. I told her she could get it when The Dad came back. That started her rage. As she was trying to kick and punch me and I was trying to get her in a therapeutic hold, GB became agitated and tried to defend me. While I was keeping GB from hurting Hope and getting her in her own space, Hope took advantage of the opportunity to head butt me.
I took her down to the floor, which was hard linoleum and dirty, and she started pounding her face into the floor. She ended up with a bruised face and a bloody lip.
In the middle of this, Hope's social worker from ICM walked in. She was there to work with the therapist and me on a safety plan. The therapist told the social worker that Hope dissociates regularly, with no warning. She said that Hope was severely sexually and physically abused. She also said Hope did not need an RTC, she needed an RTF.
The social worker's response was that she thinks Hope requires a higher level of care than she can supply and she is going to speak to her supervisor about transferring Hope's case.
I am bruised and battered and doubt the cavalry even exists.
14 comments:
Love you my friend. I'm so sorry! You are so amazing.
I'm sorry things are so hard. I hope the calvary does arrive, with some real help.
Oh nuts. So sorry for all the pain. Hoping for an answer.
So much pain in such a little girl.... she needs a calvary to help you all carry it.
I'm sorry for your girls and for YOU. I always try to remember as miserable as my daughter makes me sometimes, she is that miserable times a zillion. It helps :( What does RTF stand for?
RTF stands Tesidential Treatment. Facility. They are geared for kids with severe mental illness, not just behavior problems.
Sorry for both of you.
What is the difference between RTC and RTF ?
When you say that Hope disociates, do you mean that she has a Dissiciative identity disorder?
I'm sorry, my friend. I am glad that others are seeing the depth of her pain, so maybe someone can get her the help she needs. Wish it wasn't so hard. :-( Sending a big, gentle hug.
Did anyone ever get accused or prosecuted for the things that happened to Hope? As I'm remembering, you even had some phone contact with the former family when she first came home (as in, no one really knew the extent of how bad things had been until later?)
Just really angry on Hope's behalf that she went through such severe abuse, and sorry for the impact that it is having on her and on all of you now.
Deb
I'm sorry. From all you've gone through with Hope the therapist and the social worker are probably right.
People can disassociate from time to time without having DID, which is not as rare as it was previously thought to be and is certainly nothing like it's portrayed in the movies and on TV.
My heart goes out to you all.
You describe such pain and suffering, I am driven to pray and pray for you all, to our God who can do all things, in his infinite wisdom, in his timing (but hurry Lord, they are hurting!!), to our God who created Hope, and surely has a plan for her, even to rescue her from the previous abuse.
Caring for you, with deep admiration.
I am truly sorry, my friend. I wish I could give you a hug right now. Praying hard. (((hug)))
I am very interested in the phenomenon of missing information regarding prior placement. My entire fostering and medical history is documented in startling detail!
My daughter also has 5 missing months of her life which the adoption workers couldn't find. HOW?????\
God grant you much grace an peace as you parent Hope.
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