Tuesday, January 10, 2012
Nightmares
Hope has been having nightmares that someone comes and takes her away because she "is bad all the time". We repeat our mantra regularly. "You are ours. No matter what you do, you are ours. You are here forever". Her behavior gets worse instead of better. At this point, we are just hanging on for the ride. Sometimes, there is nothing else to do.
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5 comments:
creativity might help. showing her things in the world that are "forever" because a little person doesnt understand concretely, especially a little person that has been dumped before.
show her how MK was little and now is big with pictures and is still there
show her how the pets do something "naughty" and still stay around
show her how your pool gets dirty or needs new chemicals, but it stays.
and for pete's sake, don't tell her she is bad. use naughty or some other word. Tell her she is NOT BAD.
BAD is internalized in the self. her behaviors are naughty, she is not BAD.
Hugs to you, my friend. You are an exceptional mom. (((hug)))
Argh, that must be so hard to hear her talk about and so hard to keep working through the fall out of. Hugs, may this ride move onto easier ground for you soon.
Mmm if only all the children who need it could have a mom like you who would just hang on so that some day they may know what it feels like to be loved and secure. you're awesome. Many prayers.
Do you think maybe the behavior gets worse after because she believes she doesn't deserve such kindness? Just a thought.
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